Have you ever wondered what goes on in our gardens, parks and allotments when we are
not there? We should never underestimate the sophistication to be found within the
natural world. Cwg is privileged to share with you one example of how creatures great and
small are living a life of which we know very little.
Minutes of the meeting of the David Attenborough Memorial Gardens Users
(DAMGU) Committee incorporating the Boris Johnson Playground and 'Lite
Byte' Cafe.
Date: June 21st 3am. Venue: the patch of rough ground next to the exit leading to Lidl and
'Brenda's Outsized Fashions.'
Present:
Cat (Chair)
Squirrel (Secretary)
Shrew (Treasurer)
Juvenile Sparrow, Robin, Mole, Rabbit, Owl, Field Mouse, Dormouse, Bat, Magpie, Badger,
Pigeon, Butterfly (dipped in and out of the meeting but didn't stay long).
A special welcome was extended to new members, including 6 Parakeets and a number of
Slugs (precisely how many not ascertained but as it had been raining, quite a lot.)
Apologies:
Mr. & Mrs. Beaver (building a dam)
Hedgehog (gone to a fancy dress party as a porcupine)
Retriever (sorting out an influx of pheasants up the road)
Assistance Dog (gone Clubbing)
Police Dog (dealing with an incident in Trafalgar Square)
Acceptance/corrections/amendments to minutes of previous meeting on May 1st
The minutes of the previous meeting were accepted as an accurate record of proceedings
apart from a complaint made by a Juvenile Sparrow that there was no record of his
bringing to the attention of the meeting that the playground was shut at night, preventing
DAMGU from accessing an amenity open to human children in the daytime. Noted and
Secretary to write to the Council to highlight the inequality of this arrangement and to
request a response before the next meeting. Chair felt this was unlikely but worth a try.

Meeting Agenda:

1. Paucity of hostas in the park this year.
2. Piles of earth on the several lawns within the park.
3. Litter bins emptied every night and contents distributed throughout the park.
4. Cafe prices.
5. Special presentation by a Dormouse on 'The Future of our Parks and Open Spaces
   in a rapidly changing climate with particular reference to the current economic
   situation' (Based on a recently undertaken PHD thesis.)

1. A Slug complained that by the end of April no hostas remained in the park for munching
   overnight.
   Action: Chair agreed to speak informally to the Snail Community to explore whether more
   emphasis could be placed on 'tear and share' behaviours.
   Another Slug suggested trying the delphiniums instead.
2. Discussion as to why mounds of earth appeared regularly overnight on lawn areas and
   grassy slopes within the Park.
   A Mole said it was 'what moles do' and other users had just better suck it up.
   Action: Chair agreed to turn a blind eye. A Rabbit quipped that all Moles are blind anyway
   but this was disputed by an Owl who said that this was not true and that there wasn't
   much to see underground in a typical urban plot denuded of wildlife. Even the Worms
   have largely absconded.
3. Discussion as to why litter bins appear to be emptied every night, far exceeding Council
   commitments (and contents distributed throughout the park). A member of the Fox
   Community was asked to comment but no one was available.
   Action: Raise again at next meeting. Chair agreed to invite a Fox to speak on their behalf if
   one could be found.
4. General discussion as to why the cafe charges the sum of £8:70 for a double espresso
   and a cinnamon flapjack. A field mouse said that people need to realise that not
   everybody can afford these prices and if you have on average some 75 babies per year a
   coffee and a cake each becomes prohibitive. A Badger reminded the meeting that scones
   were normally cheaper than flapjack.
   Action: Treasurer to write to proprietor of cafe to enquire whether concessions could be
   offered to members of DAMGU, along the lines of those extended to 'Friends of Greenwich
   Park'.
5. A Dormouse was called upon to give a presentation as agreed at the previous meeting
   but was asleep in the corner and could not be roused.

AOB: A Robin asked why parakeets as foreigners were allowed to be members of DAMGU.
Chair said he regarded this remark as discriminatory and asked it not to be recorded in the
minutes.
A Bat suggested that a scheme could be set-up on a rota system employing volunteer Bats
to patrol the Park at dusk to ward off anti-social behaviours like depositing earth mounds
on the lawns and indiscriminate litter dropping. Chair thought this idea worth exploring if
enough Bats could be found willing to participate.
A Pigeon remarked at the distress caused by solitary Magpies who upset those familiar
with the ancient rhyme: 'One for Sorrow, Two for Joy etc.'
A Magpie said that as nobody liked pigeons very much it would be easy to ignore this
remark but that she would take it back to other Magpies for discussion as to the feasibility
of operating in twos as far as possible.
Date and venue of next meeting tbc.